Our old screen door blew off during that weird week of super low pressure in the Midwest. We put it in the alley and it sat there for a while, then someone took it.
Today, we went to Home Depot to buy a new one, but, bringing it out to the car, we realized it couldn't fit. "We're bad at home ownership," my wife sighed.
I went inside and brought a $13 rope. We tied the shit out of the new door to the roof of our Honda and got it home safely.
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Please don't be a jerk.